May 14, 2017
Day 134
I have been motherless longer than I have been a mother.
This thought occurred to me today.
Mother's Day is always a delicate dance of my heart bursting with ridiculous joy from carefully crafted gifts by my children, and my heart longing for one more.
One more day.
One more hour.
One more conversation.
One more laugh.
I'm left wondering, had she never gotten ill and died, what our relationship would have grown into over the last 13+ years. She would be 80. I am shy of 43, three kids deep and almost 18 years into marriage. What would our conversations be?
Would it look anything like I have imagined it would?
I am grateful I have a handful of people who share this dance floor with me.
This post is for them.
May 13, 2017
Day 133
The Rule of Thirds.
It works. It worked for Renaissance painters and it still works today.
One thing I am grateful for is learning photography in film days. One could not rely on immediate feedback of a display screen, so one had to take time to compose when shooting.
I still rely on those lessons learned over 20 years ago in high school and college dark rooms.
May 12, 2017
Day 132
To my "Type A" friends, this probably would equate to some realm of Dante's Inferno.
But to my creative friends, it makes perfect sense. This is, and has been, my world for the last few months. I joke that back when I was an ICU Nurse (and a really good one too,) I used up all my Type A tendencies in that time. I was ordered and structured and organized.
But this is how I work now... and it all makes perfect sense to me. I'm not ashamed because order does not equate happiness. Tidiness is not equal to joy. The creativity creates the chaos and the chaos harnesses the creativity.
If you come visit, I'll just shuffle some piles as you step over things, and it is all good.
May 11, 2017
Day 131
Pretty in Pink.
My garden is bursting with shades of pink, set against the bright blue sky, epitomizing spring.
It is such fragile, short-lived beauty.
May 10, 2017
Day 130
Once a month, I am at the church in the evening. During these times I get to see the windows as they were meant to be seen; illuminated from the outside.
I was married under these windows almost 18 years ago. If I had been told that 18 years later I would be President of the church's council, I would have scoffed and said "NEVER!"
In the dark sanctuary, the luminosity of the windows calm me. I am reminded that He has got this crazy thing, my life, under control. Even if I don't. And I am reminded to never say never.
May 9, 2017
Day 129
Is it a weed? A flower? An edible green?
I guess it is a matter of perspective.
I know I just love the way it looks through my macro lens. Its anthers curling in tiny "y" shapes. These things, detested by many, are fascinating under close inspection.
Many things are full of wonder if we choose to look closely.
May 8, 2017
Day 128
It was our third and final "Three Piggy Opera."
The older two sat with us and sang along, both of them having performed it as Kindergarteners.
I suppose it is the first of many "lasts" as time seems to quickly flee and they all continue to grow too fast.